Returning to My Little Island

It appears that I am making a visit back to my little island again. I feel it. It’s been nagging at me for some time but I now recognize my self-imposed solitary confinement. This time, however, I am making the trip there for a different reason.

Before, I felt isolated from others due to my fear of the opinions that my friends and family might have because I am an atheist. I cowered in the corner for fear that someone might find out and their opinion of me would be shattered; that they might actually think I was a “bad” person because I am an atheist. This poor lost soul. A good friend in life that they won’t see after death because obviously I must be going to hell. These thoughts restricted my life and kept me alone and afraid for so long.

This time, however, not at all afraid. My island has changed a little from my last visit. I no longer fear whether someone knows I am an atheist or not. Granted, there are still members of my family and some friends who may not know. But if opportunity arose for me to share my thoughts, I wouldn’t be afraid to tell them the truth. I now have an arsenal of facts and ideas to back myself up. I have opinions and positions when it comes to politics and human rights and the influence religion has on them. I am now a much more militant atheist in my thoughts and my isolation stems from the fact that I now want to tackle religion head on and drive it out of the lives of those I love. But to attempt to do so would very well destroy important relationships. So, alone on my island I sit waiting for the right time to invite some new people to visit.

The friends I associate with most here in Tucson are religious folks and they know I am an atheist… and they still like me anyways. That was the result of me getting off my island the first time. But now as I look to reconfigure my place amongst these religious friends in a way that is non-confrontational, I find that I am having a difficult time. These people are intelligent. I simply can’t understand why they find the need to believe in imaginary sky fairies and can’t see the big picture. Why can’t they have more faith in themselves and what THEY can do instead of relying on god. We, as humans, are amazingly powerful creatures. There is so much good we can do if we just take action instead of praying about it.

I am not sure how long I plan on staying on my island this time. Not sure what it will take to get me out of my head. Perhaps I just need to redirect my energy and become an activist for the secular movement. With the elections coming up this year, there are plenty of opportunities for me to try to make a difference. I NEED to do something for my kids’ sake. The religious right-wing nut jobs out there are making me MAD and I can’t stand for it any longer.